1. The Weepies (135) 
2. Hellogoodbye (40) 
3. Regina Spektor (37) 
4. Cat Power (19) 
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Imported from Last.fm Tumblr by JoeLaz

A few things from this weekend.

1. I downloaded the ten-day free trial of World of Warcraft and so far I am liking it.
2. I saw an amazing mustache that I wish I had.
3. I finished a really awesome book that inspired me to write again.
4. A small girl saw two little people and said, “How do they drive?” It was funny.
5. Church was cool, my little brother sat next to me. I think he misses me.
6. Fireworks on the drive home from work on July 4th.
7. Finished my homework.
8. This old guy said, and I quote, ”I like your hair. Don’t make me feel like a pedophile, you’re kinda cute.”
9. I actually wrote something that I enjoy.
10. Someone said I look like Megan Fox. I am no fan, nor do I look remotely similar to her, but she is still pretty gorgeous.
11. I miss Angelo immensely. I cannot wait for next Saturday.

Amanda is waiting. She had thought the church service started at ten o’clock. She didn’t realize until she was half way there that it does not start until ten-thirty. She makes this mistake almost every week.

            She is waiting for her mother, step-father, and siblings to arrive and fill the five seats she has saved for them. She has been house-sitting for her boyfriend’s family who is vacationing in Italy for two weeks and has not been home for the last week and a half. She misses her family. Today she will only be with them during the service and she must leave to get ready for work as soon as it is over. She wishes she did not work on weekends.

            A family files into the row of seats behind her. She feels awkward listening to their conversation and sitting alone. Every few minutes she turns around to look past the family to see if her family has arrived yet. Every few minutes a different family walks down the isle eying the five empty seats, but they pass by when they see the sweater and bag Amanda has laid over them marking them as saved. She wishes her family would get here because she is chilly and wants to put her sweater on. The green and black sweater doesn’t actually belong to Amanda. She grabbed it out of her boyfriend’s laundry basket the other day and has been using it all week.

            A woman steps onto the stage in the high school auditorium the church holds its service in. She talks about communication and the band plays the chorus to a Led Zeppelin song. One of the things that drew Amanda in was the music they play. The woman steps back onto the stage and says another few words about how people talk then the band plays another few seconds of a popular 80’s song. This happens a few more times until the band breaks into a full-length cover a popular country song about a woman who talks too much about herself. Amanda’s family still has not arrived.

            When the song has ended the singer steps to the front and begins to give this week’s announcements. She is about seven or eight months pregnant and her protruding belly button creeps Amanda out. Protruding belly buttons always give her heebie-jeebies. She wonders what she will do when she is pregnant one day. Finally her family begins to file into the seats she has saved for them. When she first sees them from the corner of her eye she thinks they might be a different family, but when she looks there is no doubt that they belong to her. Amanda’s younger brother squeezes past the rest of the family so that he is seated next to her. She wonders if he has been missing her.

            The rest of the service goes by as usual. Amanda always notices how pastors are experts at making a large group laugh one second and remain silent and solemn the next. They know just how to cut to your heart when you least expect it, in a good way, of course.

            At the end of the service the band plays a song that particularly catches Amanda’s attention. “You desire truth in the deepest parts, not an offering or sacrifice,” is the lyric that resonates in her heart. Lately she has been contemplating her relationship with God and exactly what it means keep that relationship healthy. To her, the lyric tells her what she has been needing to hear, that one of the underlying truths about a relationship with God is to not hide in fear from Him, but to be truthful and honest and to open yourself up to him completely. It gives her hope.

            When the service is ended Amanda invites her brother to spend the night and swim at her boyfriend’s house the day after her sisters spend the night. He seems somewhat excited. Either way she is excited to spend time with him. They get along well for the most part, though since he started high school and joined the wrestling team his favorite hobby has been getting revenge on all the times she picked on him when they were younger. It is always weird when younger siblings grow larger than you. She kisses her sisters and mom goodbye and walks out to her car. Her cowboy boots clunk on the sidewalk with each step. The sound is almost as good as skateboard wheels on sidewalk, she thinks.

You are so freaking awesome. I was reading your entry on your conservative beliefs. I agree on most of those.

I had no idea you were catholic though. You are so passionate about having a relationship with God and growing up in the Catholic church I was never encouraged in that. I think it is awesome. My younger sister recently came to my youth group at a Nazarene church and really enjoyed it but she is terrified my dad and her mom will be disappointed in her and she is confused. I tried to explain to her that she can totaly be Catholic and have a relationship with God. I plan on using you as an example the next time I hang out with her, if that is cool with you, which I am sure it is.

I just wanted to let you know I think you are a totally rad person. That’s all. Thanks for being on tumblr and speaking up. Its brave.

lickystickypickyme:

Nancy Sinatra - These boots are made for walking.

I just so happen to be wearing my beloved cowboy boots this morning. :)

I finished this book yesterday. It has ignited my love of writing once again. i started writing a bit this morning before church. Lol. Now I am about to read To Kill a Mockingbird for the very first time. My mom has been trying to get me to read it for years and I finally caved in when she asked this morning. She brought it to me at church. I hear its pretty good.

I dunno about you guys, but I really do not want to put my hand in there. Ew. So freaking nasty.

Shiloh is all over me. Seconds before I took this pic he was literally laying on top of me. Weird dog.

And play WoW. Since Angelo is in Italy and cannot tell me exactly what I am doing in the game I am going to call up my cousin Max and chat about it.

I really had no idea. I mean, I totally knew that I would definitely miss you, but frankly, I have never been one to miss people very much. I miss you though. I miss every single thing about you. I miss texting you all day. I miss being wrapped in your arms. I miss kissing you. I feel like my heart is with you in Italy and it doesn’t feel right at all that it should be so far away. I want to get out of work and cuddle up in your bed and hug your pillow as tightly as I can and pretend that I am really hugging you.

I was texting Taylor that she needs to read this book that I am currently reading, which is excellent, and I typed the words “a lot” in the text and thought of you because the night you first said you loved me you had said you liked me a lot to which I asked if it was a whole parking lot.

Gosh, I really miss you, Angelo. It is ridiculous. I check facebook so often waiting to see if you have been on and messaged me or if maybe I can catch you on there again. I keep my phone close to me at all times in case you text me from Damian’s phone. I am like a stupid, sad, annoying girl that I want to tell to get over it becasue, come on, it is ridiculous to miss someone so much, but I really just cannot help it. You haven’t left my mind for one second. You’re in my dreams even. I cannot wait to see you and talk to you again. I want to hear everything about Italy, every detail. Maybe I just want to hear you talking. haha. Also, I wish you were here because I just realized today that I am going to be twenty and it is scary and I am going to be old and not a kid anymore, but I know that you would assure me that twenty isn’t bad and I would believe you and be more excited than sad like I am now. I think only you could really do that. I love you, Angelo. :)

That’s a keeper! This morning Chips wasn’t in the bed and I was like “OH NO, SIA GOT HIM AGAIN!” So I jumped out of bed and searched the house. Chips ended up being slightly under Angelo’s bed. He probably fell out of my arms and knowing Sia would get him if she woke up moved so he was better hidden. He is such a smart puppy.

BTW, how freaking hot do I look first thing in the morning? Hahaha. What a total dork.

Smile Friday-Clown Edition. This was me at Taylor’s Circus b-day party. It was sweet.

Baby, its fact.

Check out my sparkly, orange nails!